Are you planning a wedding in Italy or adopting some Italian customs to your own wedding?
Italian couples distinctively celebrate their engagement. We’ve rounded up some fascinating wedding and engagement traditions in Italy for you.
If you are planning or attending an Italian wedding, you should be aware of some important Italian wedding traditions. You may not be of Italian descent, but if you want to get married in Italy, you should follow the traditions for your wedding to be extra memorable. It will also provide a different flavor to the celebrations.
Engagement and Wedding Traditions in Italy
Let us explore some long-standing customs and practices known specifically to Italians with the following engagement and wedding traditions in Italy.
Engagement Traditions in Italy
Each culture has a different way of celebrating the event and the Italians have a rather old-school way of doing it. Here’s a list of some distinct Italian engagement traditions.
Gaining Permission
In Italy, the groom must first ask the bride’s father if he can marry his daughter before he can propose to her.
In certain locations, couples prefer to become engaged first, then announce their engagement to their parents later.
• Northern Italy
Instead of a gathering of friends and family, the northern Italian custom focuses on bringing the parents together. Families from both sides get to know each other during this time leading up to the big day.
• Southern Italy
A dowry and a binding contract were established in the past. There is no longer a dowry or a contract in place anymore. Modern customs include a kiss for good luck after the engagement ring is given at the party.
Looking for the best proposal spots in Italy? Check out this post!
Engagement Ring
Italians like a diamond solitaire on a gold or silver band for an engagement ring. A diamond ring and a passionate kiss serve as a symbol of everlasting love. Italian couples then immediately begin preparing a gathering of their relatives to announce and celebrate the news of their engagement.
Engagement Party
For the Italians, there is no such thing as an engagement party. Instead, the pair sets up a family dinner where they may get to know each other, with the blessing of both sides. They then declare their intention to get married.
Food is a significant part of many Italian celebrations. If they haven’t met before, the parents of the bride and groom must get together when the engagement is announced. This meeting is frequently preceded by a luncheon.
Bachelorette and Bachelor Parties
To mark the occasion of their engagement, the couple throws a party. After the engagement and before the wedding, males have a bachelor party of their own. It’s not uncommon for this to involve a meal, drinks, and some form of gambling.
No such celebration was ever held by Italian ladies until a few decades ago. It was in the 1970s that the term “hen” or “bachelorette” parties were coined. In Italy, these parties offer a chance for the bride’s female friends and relatives to have a good time together. This usually happens one or two weeks before the wedding.
Wedding Traditions in Italy
Traditions are deeply ingrained in the Italian lifestyle and weddings are no exception. From planning the union to the after-party, here are some fascinating Italian wedding traditions.
While Planning and Before the Wedding
• La Serenata
When it comes to romance, the Italians are unmatched. The night before the wedding, the groom sings to the bride from the window of her bedroom. Only the bride is in the dark, which adds intrigue for everyone else.
As soon as the bride wakes up and hears the sound of her future husband’s lovely voice, she gets to (symbolically) accept the marriage. She does this by lowering a basket of bread, cheese, and prosciutto.
• Wedding Date
Friday weddings are uncommon in Italy because it is believed that evil spirits are born on this day, therefore being married on a Friday will only bring you bad luck. The best day to be married is on a Sunday, which is considered the luckiest day of the week to do so and represents a happy marriage full of children.
Wedlock is said to be more likely to break up on Tuesdays than other days of the week, due to the widespread belief that nuptials on Tuesdays are doomed to failure.
• No Sneak Peeks Before the Big Day!
In some Italian regions, the practice of the groom not seeing the bride before the wedding has gone even further — the bride isn’t even allowed to see herself. Brides are allowed to see their reflection once they’re fully dressed and ready to go to the wedding.
• Superstition
The bride also wears green on the wedding eve. This is due to the belief that this color is lucky. On the contrary, she should not wear anything in gold besides her wedding ring gold.
Traditional Italian Style Wedding Dress Code
• The Bridal Gown
To symbolize purity and innocence, white is the traditional color for the bride’s gown. White dress for female guests has been popular in recent years, although it is still deemed unsuitable unless the couple specifically requests it.
The famed Italian tailoring traditions are reflected in the exquisite fabrics used in Italian wedding gowns. Depending on the bride’s style, an Italian traditional gown can be embellished with unique motifs and accessories.
Clothing Etiquette for Italian Weddings
• Civil Wedding
Symbolic and civil ceremony dresses have no specific rules, so the bride can be as daring as she wants.
• Church Wedding
It’s best to stay away from low-cut necklines and miniskirts if you’re being married in a Catholic church. This shouldn’t limit your options; you may dress up a strapless gown with a chic shawl, cape, or bolero.
• Family of the Bride and Groom
The mother of the bride and the maid of honor should wear an Italian wedding outfit that is appropriate for the season, the venue, and the time of day. Natural and breathable textiles like silk, cotton, and linen are ideal for summer weddings in Italy when temperatures can soar.
• Guests
Guests’ attire can be specified on the invitations to the wedding.
Women attending a Catholic wedding are expected to dress in semi-formal or formal apparel, with the necklines and shoulders covered with a jacket or a shawl.
Ladies should wear knee-length or longer dresses for formal weddings, whereas at more casual events they can wear shorter gowns of the same length.
In the morning and afternoon, wear light colors, and in the evening, wear dark colors.
Ceremony
•Getting to the Ceremony
Before the wedding, the groom is not allowed to see the bride. He and his witness wait for the bride and her father to arrive at the altar, where they will “give her away.”
In a civil wedding, the bride and groom arrive together with their families and friends, but in a Catholic ceremony, the bride and groom arrive separately.
• The Bouquet Is Paid for by the Groom
The bouquet is the final presentation the groom gives the bride as a boyfriend. It must be paid for by the groom and delivered to the bride’s house on the morning of the wedding.
The bouquet can be chosen by the bride with specifications as to the color and type of flowers, to make sure it matches her gown.
• Good Luck Charm
Weddings are believed to be blessed with good fortune when the bride and groom both keep small pieces of iron in their garments. The groom can keep it in his suit pockets, while the bride can clip a small piece of iron on her veil.
• Wedding Rings
The exchange of rings is perhaps the most prominent part of any marriage ceremony — in either civil or church wedding, regardless of culture and religion.
In Italy, the wedding band is called fede. This word also means “faith” in the Italian language.
Wedding rings are the most powerful representation of the bond shared by the bride and groom, symbolizing not only the love between the couple but their faithfulness and commitment to each other as well.
In Italy, wearing the wedding ring on the left hand is a tradition that dates back to Roman times. The left ring finger is believed to be connected directly to the heart by a special vein called vena amoris, or the vein of love.
After the Ceremony
To represent a shower of fertility, rice is tossed at the newlyweds as they exit the church or ceremony hall. In Sicily, however, the wedding tradition dictates that wheat be thrown instead. They have the same meaning: prosperity and fertility.
After the wedding in some Italian regions, the newlyweds are required to cut a log in half with a double-handled saw. This is a sign of the couple’s unity.
Ribbon-tying in front of the church is another wonderful ritual. Ribbons are used to symbolize the bride and groom’s “tying the knot.”
• Tossing a Bouquet
In Italian weddings, the bride releases her bouquet at a group of unmarried ladies at the end of the ceremony, and they all try to catch it. That next bride will catch the bouquet.
This, however, is more than just a gorgeous prop. It represents the continuation of tradition and the beginning of new families.
• Reception
It’s no secret that food and drink play an important role in Italian culture, and wedding feasts are no exception.
During the aperitivo, which occurs before the newlyweds arrive, savory snacks and alcoholic beverages, such as Campari, prosecco, and wine, are typically served.
For the sit-down meal, you’ll first be served antipasti, followed by two main courses (typically pasta and risotto), various meats and vegetables, and then dessert, which is accompanied by espresso and liqueurs.
• Cash Gifts
Brides in Italy carry a satin bag at the reception where guests can deposit money in envelopes. In exchange for a dance with the male guests, some brides-to-be wear it around their necks.
• La Tarantella
Guests perform “La Tarantella” to congratulate the newlyweds on their marriage. As the music speeds up, guests clasp hands and rotate clockwise, and then counterclockwise.
• Bomboniere
Just before guests depart at the end of the wedding day, the bride and groom present modest presents to their guests as a token of their gratitude. A gift, called confetti (sugared almonds), and printed ribbons make up a Bomboniere in Italy.
Italian confetti-filled Bomboniere is a sign of the joys of being a family. They use an odd number of confetti to give to each guest — preferably 5 or 7, which are both good luck numbers.
• To a Fresh Start
The newlyweds are expected to stick around for the duration of the reception, if not beyond it. After the reception, several close friends stay with the newlyweds. They have a drink together or perhaps accompany them to their new home.
Looking for the best places to get married in Italy? Click here.